Strange Things I Find in My Purse

So it's Spring Break around here, which means I have three rugrats under my feet all day every day, arguing, waking the little one up early from his nap, demanding sandwiches, and spilling yogurt on the reasonably new yellow couch.

Which means the weather turned unseasonably cold and windy (and I don't just mean a strong breeze, I mean the kind that makes men with combovers run for cover and creates an obstacle course of blown-over empty garbage cans and lids on garbage day).

Which means it's amazing that I made it to Wednesday before we had a session at the McDonald's PlayPlace down the road.

Which means Happy Meals. THREE Happy Meals.

Which means germs, countless germs, but we won't think about that any more now, will we? After all, I did make them wash their hands afterwards. It was sanity wersus a potential cold, and sanity wins every time.

Which means I came home with a purse full of three identical forgotten useless Happy Meal toys that should consider their days numbered until they are chucked into the garbage or donated to Goodwill. Really, I want to know the percentage of landfill clutter nationwide that McDonald's Happy Meal toys are responsible for creating.

Anyway, as I took them out of my conveniently mommy-sized purse, I remembered some blog tagging thing I saw on a MommyBlog I followed a couple of years ago where you were supposed to blog about the weirdest thing you had in your purse at that moment. Clever. I know for a fact that since I've become a mother, my purse is, at any given time, home to quite a number of things I don't know about. So I thought I'd look into it today, and since I know you are out there clamoring for more details on my fabulous life, I thought I'd share the results with you. Aren't you just the luckiest!

Now let's not count the basics. You know, wallet, phone, sunglasses, keys, lipstick, various receipts, supermarket lists, scary-old-looking emergency-use feminine products and loose change. Those are just commonplace. Instead, let me dwell on the more random.

- A Bible verse puzzle made by my son in Sunday School
- Three bobby pins (whaa? no idea when I last would have used bobby pins)
- Chocolate chip cookies (in a bag, thankfully, which is not necessarily a given)
- One (1) tic-tac
- A lollipop (not surprising, really)
- Two pair of 3-D glasses (saw Monsters and Aliens Saturday night with the fam)
- A halogen book light
- A nametag with my name on it
- A nametag with hubby's name on it
- One Hot Wheels car (surprised there weren't more)
- A projectile made to look like ice from some past Happy Meal toy
- Valentine's sticker sheet with most of the stickers gone
- Neutrogena sunscreen
- The muzzle part of a foam cow mask from my middle son's early March class play
- Program from same
- One dark chocolate bar (56% Cacao)
- One tube of Clinique Black Honey Almost Lipstick, still in semi-smooshed box
Wonder what MacGyver could do with all that. And I'm not cleaning it out, either. No way, you never know when I might need one of those things to save the world from destruction (or at least save me from any one of a number of ravages of toddlerhood). Yup. That's just how I roll. (*Blows on knuckles, shines them on lapel*)

Since I know you're wondering now, yes, my purse is the size of a small suitcase. I have quite the developed right shoulder. It's a wonder small animal nests and garden gnomes didn't come tumbling out of it.

Aight, I'm out. I think it's Pizza Night. More good nutrition for the shorties; I'm really having a banner day here.