Friday, September 09, 2005

Vegetable Oil Paradise

I think my dream of having a child who accepts only fruits and vegetables as snack foods are dashed. Okay, I don't think, I know. Why? Because I declared today Fast-Food Friday and the Chicken and I ate our chicken nugget/ tater tot/ pizza roll lunch in front of the TV. She in her pink Bean-bag chair, and I on my Chaise Lounge watching Kathy Griffin's Reality show. So there we were, muching on our well-preserved and deeply fried lunches, getting a buzz off of all the sodium and additives in our unnaturally delicious food, all puffy bellies and elevated feet, with oil slicks on our fingers and giant smiles of contentedness on our faces. She must get that from me- I'm so proud. Can you imagine the hell of a junk-food junkie mom having to live with a vege-frutarian exercise junkie? I'm thinking that would be about the sixth ring of hell. Maybe even the seventh ring. So now I have a new goal for my little Chicken's future. I want to instill in her a deep appreciation of the arts of laziness and junk-food diet-planning. Lets just hope she likes her Dad better and decides to take up gardening and jogging while knowing better than to criticize Mommy for her well-developed talent of growing fat-rolls.

The I.O.


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